Saturday, March 19, 2011

Making the Wheels Turn

Whoa.  I "stumbleupon"-ed this website just tonight.  Josh had found it last week and read it to me and it had left a lingering thought in my mind.  And now I find it again so soon and all my thoughts and ponderings on the meaning of life have resurfaced and I am sure will be at the front of my mind for the next week.  I feel like everyone should read this - it will make the wheels start turning... 

I wish I could give credit to the guy who wrote this, but it is all anonymous..... Enjoy. 

You were on your way home when you died.  
It was a car accident.  Nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless.  You left behind a wife and two children.  It was a painless death.  The EMTs tried their best to save you, but to no avail.  Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.

And that's when you met me.

"What... what happened?"  You asked.  "Where am I?"

"You died," I said, matter-of-factly.  No point in mincing words.

"There was a... a truck and it was skidding..."

"Yup," I said.

"I... I died?"

"Yup.  But don't feel bad about it.  Everyone dies," I said.

You looked around.  There was nothingness.  Just you and me.  "What is this place?" You asked.  "Is this the afterlife?"

"More or less," I said.

"Are you God?" You asked.

"Yup," I replied. "I'm God."

"My kids... my wife," you said.

"What about them?"

"Will they be all right?"

"That's what I like to see," I said.  "You just died and your main concern is your family.  That's good stuff right there."

You looked at me with fascination.  To you, I didn't look like God.  I just looked like some man.  Or possibly a woman.  Some vague authority figure, maybe.  More of a grammar school teacher tha the almightly.

"Don't worry," I said.  "They'll be fine.  Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way.  They didn't have time to grow contempt for you.  Your wife will cry on the outside, but will be secretly relieved.  To be fair, your marriage was falling apart.  If it's any consolation, she'll feel very guilty for feeling relieved."

"Oh," you said.  "So what happens now?  Do I go to heaven or hell or something?"

"Neither," I said.  "You'll be reincarnated."

"Ah," you said.  "So the Hindus were right."

"All religions are right in their own way," I said.  "Walk with me.

You followed along as we strode through the void.  "Where are we going?"

"Nowhere in particular," I said.  "It's just nice to walk while we talk."

"So what's the point, then?" You asked.  "When I get reborn, I'll just be a blank slate, right?  A baby.  So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won't matter."

"Not so!"  I said.  "You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all your past lives.  You just don't remember them right now."

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders.  "Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine.  A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are.  It's like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it's hot or cold.  You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you've gained all the experiences it had.

"You've been a human for the last 58 years, so you haven't stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness.  If we hung out here for long enough, you'd start remembering everything.  But there's no point to doing that between each life."

"How man times have I been reincarnated, then?"

"Oh lots.  Lots and lots.  And into lots of different lives," I said.  "This time around, you'll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD."

"Wait, what?" You stammered.  "You're sending me back in time?"

"Well, I guess technically.  Time, as you know it, only exists in your universe.  Things are different where I come from."

"Where you come from?" You said.

"Oh sure," I explained, "I come from somewhere.  Somewhere else.  And there are others like me.  I know you'll want to know what it's like there, but honestly you wouldn't understand."

"Oh," you said, a little let down.  "But wait.  If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point."

"Sure.  Happens all the time.  And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don't even know it's happening."

"So what's the point of it all?"

"Seriously?" I asked.  "Seriously?  You're asking me for the meaning of life?  Isn't that a little stereotypical?"

"Well it's a reasonable question," you persisted.

I looked you in the eye.  "The meaning of life, the reason I made this whole universe, is for you to mature."
"You mean mankind?  You want us to mature?"

"No just you.  I made this whole universe for you.  With each new life you grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect."

"Just me?  What about everyone else?"

"There is no one else," I said.  "In this universe, there's just you and me."

You stared blankly at me.  "But all of the people on earth..."

"All you.  Different incarnations of you."

"Wait.  I'm everyone?!"

"Now you're getting it," I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.

"I'm every human being who ever lived?"

"Or who will ever live, yes."

"I'm Abraham Lincoln?"

"And you're John Wilkes Booth, too," I added.

"I'm Hitler?" you said, applled.

"And you're the millions he killed."

"I'm Jesus?"

"And you're everyone who followed him."

You fell silent.

"Every time you victimized someone," I said, "You were victimizing yourself.  Every act of kindness you've done, you've done to yourself.  Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by you."

You thought for a long time.

"Why?"  You asked me.  "Why do all this?"

"Because someday, you will become like me.  Because that's what you are.  You're one of my kind.  You are my child."

"Whoa," you said, incredulous.  "You mean I'm a god?"

"No.  Not yet.  You're a fetus.  You're still growing.  Once you've lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born."

"So the whole universe," you said, "It's just..."

"An egg."  I answered.  "Now it's time for you to move on to your next life."

And I sent you on your way.

Friday, March 18, 2011

"Josh's Girlfriend"

Ok.  So this one is a bit of a rant.  Bear with me.

This semester I have been forced to take Stage Lighting so I can get my degree.  Like it's essential or something.... Josh is taking Costume Construction at that time. Talk about a messed up universe.  I'm pretty sure the entire universe stops for those 50 minutes because it's so confused.  Anyhow.  I have heard how tough Ron's tests are and such and I have NEVER understood lights.  My good friend Jamie does them and while we were both at Southwester, I always was in awe of her for knowing all this stuff that was so utterly confusing to me and so completely not interesting.

So I've been busting my ass to get a good grade in that class.  I have read the book, took detailed notes and asked Josh questions that I have been confused about for the tests.  I've gotten 97 and 100 on both of the tests!  Super happy about that!

We had an assignment in class that I surprisingly really enjoyed.  We were to cue a song of our choice in the light lab.  I chose the ridiculous song by Britney Spears:  Bombastic Love.  I had so much fun!  I had used a board like the one in the lab at Southwestern (O Lordy, the fears that the name 'Eagerheart' brings to light board ops) so I knew how to set cues and use the board to it's full potential.  I used a gobo.  That was the only part Josh had to help me on.  He was gone the entire week I worked on this and came back on Sunday and let me run it for him.  He told me it was impossible to use a gobo on the lights in the lab, but I could use the ERS on the stand in the room.  That was it.  As soon as I finished my kickass show in class everyone said, "Wow.  Do you know Josh Taylor?"  

What the hell.  Seriously?  I spent 5 hours in this light lab by myself designing this.  Josh was not even in town.  He had no phone for me to call and answer questions.  

The excuse for me getting such high scores on the tests is that I am dating Josh Taylor.  How the hell does that get me good scores?  One of his roommates is in that class.  He didn't get a high score.  3 or 4 or the other students in the class are his good friends and they didn't get as high as scores as I do.  It's because I asked for help.  I asked intelligent questions of him.  Everyone else in that class could have.  No one did.  

I just get enraged when people when people attribute my hard work to Josh because I'm his girlfriend.  I'm just an intelligent human being who asks questions.  Josh isn't that bad ass, I am....