"It Will Get Better"

I got on Facebook today to check up on the latest gossip as I do every day, only to find this incredible video that one of my professors from Southwestern College had posted.  Coming from a small town school with the 'butch' ideals that I am pretty comfortable assuming are similar to Texas, this shocked me.  Having a little brother the same age as these boys mentioned in this speech broke my heart.  This action that is spoke of makes me terrified to bring a child into this world.  I cannot understand how, in a world that has come so far to break international barriers and to make such progress in racism and that has a vast majority of the population recognizing themselves as religious or believing in some sort of Supreme Being, this can be tolerated and continued.  What kind of atmosphere are these bullying children being raised in?

Whether a belief is agreed with or not, we do not have the right to judge people for it.  How can the situation possibly be made better by bringing others down or planting the seed of suicide?  

I feel strongly that this video should be shared with everyone.  Email it, tweet it, blog it, facebook it - do whatever, just share it.  At the very least, share it by being an example of this man's words...

http://tv.gawker.com/5663083/this-is-the-most-touching-it-gets-better-video-you-will-ever-see

Blood Donation

So, ESU had a blood drive recently and I signed up to give blood today.  I had never had the chance to participate in a blood drive before so I was pretty excited for it!  I went in, had to read a whole bunch of matierls, briefly panicked that my trip to Europe would deter me from being able to donate, got a cool 'first-time donor' pin, got a sticker with my name on it that said I donated blood, got a free t-shirt and a number.... Then I sat and waited....  They had all the waiting seats facing the opposite direction of where the donating chairs were.  It was in the ballroom, so it's a ginormous open room.  You would be sitting there patientily, waiting to be asked multiple questions about where you've been, who you've been with, and if you've sold yourself recently - all the while, people were fainting or chatting away or listening to iPods or eating cookies while pints upon pints of blood were being bumped out.  Kind of disturbing.  However, I was still excited to do this!

They finally called my number and this delightful Red Cross nurse named Patty set me up.  She was a chatty cathy telling me all about where her work takes her in Kansas (VERY thrilling!) and about the people she works with.  Then I had to answer a whole bunch of questions.  They got kind of suspicious of me for being in Europe in the past three years, but calmed down and decided I was decontaminated when I told them it had been over 12 months ago.  Interrupting thought - That's sad.  I need to travel again.  It sure doesn't feel like a year....

Then Patty checked out both my arms, marked both of them, and decided the left was best.  I know these people do this about a bajillion times a day, but they are SOOOOO much better at finding veins than the nurses in the ElDorado Emergency Room.  After she got the needle in me, she was telling me about how it's sometimes more difficult for people who have veins closer to the side of their arm rather than in the middle (like me) and that she was going to have to hold the needle in rather than tape it.  So we were talking a little bit about the process, she told me it would only take about 5 minutes, we were watching the bag fill up.  This sounds morbid, no?  I thought it would creep me out a little bit, but I actually brought out the inner teenage boy in me and found it kind of cool!  

Then about 2 minutes in, I started to get a little dizzy.... I just told myself, "Come on, Bri.  Push through.  Take a couple of deep breaths.  You can do this." Then the black dots started closing in and I told Patty I was feeling lightheaded..... She was in the middle of saying, "Just take some deep....."  And then the tunnel rapidly closed in on me....

Just as quickly as I passed out, I came too.  But it was weird.... A whole bunch of scenes kept flashing.  In one, I'm pretty sure there was my family, in another there was Marah, in another I was in a train station... They were very vivid, but within a minute of me coming too, I lost most of the images.  The last one was of three doctors standing over me and it took me a few seconds to realize it was not my imagination, there were, in fact, real nurses asking me my name and where I was at.... It was creepy, but really badass....

They made me lay there for forever.  I thought I was going to puke.  Surprisingly, if you get dizzy, all you have to do is take a deep breath then cough.  Repeat that a couple of times and you're golden.  It was a double edged sword for me.... I thought fainting was super cool.  It was the only time I've been 100% out of control of my body.  Yet, at the same time, I didn't get to donate any blood.  They have to pull the needle from you once you faint.  Seems pretty obvious.  But now I feel like I can't wear the t-shirt.  I didn't wear my sticker all day... 

In a couple of months, I'm gonna try again....

Senioritous and Severing Ties

First of all, IT"S FALL!  I love fall!  I stumbled upon this picture that makes me think of October.... I can't wait for the leaves to turn in Emporia. It's a really beautiful place to be during the fall - there are so many colors!

Ok.  So I went to see Social Network yesterday.  It was a pretty good movie, I would recommend everyone seeing it.  If not in theaters, rent it later.  It was an interesting concept - well not concept really because all this did happen, so story - that the guy who created this social network that unifies billions of people across the world severed all ties to the people that cared about him.  He didn't do it for the money, he simply did it for the recognition.  He was so incredibly obsessed about being part of a elite social club in college that when he didn't get into one he did everything in his power to create his own social club and to throw it in a few specific people's faces.  He severed all ties to justify himself... Or what he thought was justice.  

This ties in with senioritous right now for me.  I have lazy senioritious.  I simply don't want to go to class, especially the gen eds.  It's hard to sit through Earth Science lecture and find it valuable to my education.  Whatever.  This semester is already half way done and I'm freaking about grad schools... But a few of my fellow seniors have a problem with humbleness... That's the worst case of senioritous one can get.  A snide comment was made to me that I should work in the shop all the way until closing because I had no rehearsal that evening - what could I possibly have to do?  When I replied that I had a great load of homework to complete the person answered with another cutting remark of how nice it must be to start homework before 10!  I wanted to remind this person that if they didn't wish to attend rehearsal, someone else in the department could adequately and most willingly replace them...  But I didn't.... A few of the seniors here are making it difficult to work with them.  Their years of 'hard work' here at ESU have earned them the right to superiority.  They, too, are severing ties with underclassmen and some important references they have been establishing.  I just don't understand how the little time that is left could not be cherished when it comes to spending it with the people you live with and work with on a day-to-day basis...

Another problem I am facing with severing ties is with my family.  According to them, I don't come home near enough.  And my little brother is pretty sure my boyfriend is sucking up all my time... :)  I just find it difficult to make the trip home every weekend.  And as lame as this sounds, I don't have enough gas money to do that.  I love it when I get to go home!  There is nothing more fitting for the fall than to go home on a chilly Friday evening and watch an 8-man football game.  I love it!  Especially when it's cold enough for the concession stand to sell hot chocolate...  This is the first Saturday I've spent in Emporia since classes have started.  It's just nice to take a breather sometimes.  However, I know that my career path will only take me farther away from Kansas and my time with my family will only get to be less and fare more precious... I've got to make a conscious effort to go home more...

So, yeah.  While I have a weaker rehearsal schedule this semester, I need to spend my time enjoying the people I'm around.  And I need to avoid Stuck-Up Senioritous.  One brief moment though:  I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THE CAAP TEST!  WOOT!  WOOT!  Ok.  Moving on...